Welcome back wicked ones. Oh, this week we're getting naked again. That's right, we've already learnt about all the benefits of being naked so it's now time to take our nakedness out of the house and strut our stuff on a nudist beach. Are you ready to let it all hang out?
Perhaps you're already a naked little beach goer... Good on you, you bear butted beauty keep it up. But, if you're new to this whole 'naked in public' thing then it could be quite a nerve-wracking experience. So let's get to know the rules of a nudist beach together so we don't embarrass ourselves further!
Okay so first up... We know nudity is celebrated on this beach but don't feel pressured into stripping right down to your birthday suit if you're not comfortable with that yet. Why not wear your bikini and gradually let things peep out? I'm sure after a few non accidental nip slips you'll be comfortable enough to whip that top off and let your booby pointers enjoy a little freedom. Once you're comfortable with this perhaps try a quick pull of the panties and sit down with your legs together so you're not showing the entire beach your vajayjay? Just make sure you sit on a towel, you really don't want sand getting in there!
On the subject of towels... This is a huge must, make sure you have brought your own towel. The last thing you want is an elderly sweaty bloke offering to share his towel with you!
Okay, so you're naked (well done), you're enjoying the scenery or at least the view of the ocean. Just take it all in. Perhaps you're enjoying having a little look around at all the incredibly brave naked bodies on the beach. There's shapes and sizes galore. You may even find it amusing? Just think long and hard before you decide to take any beachy pics as even nudist might not be comfortable being forever saved completely naked in your photo album. On second thoughts... Where would you even keep the camera?
So now you're naked and behaving yourself by not taking pictures of others, next rule... Cover up. No put the towel down, I don't mean in that way, I mean protect your sensitive skin from the sun. A lot of the skin you now have on show is usually wrapped up and protected by clothing, the sun can be very harmful to these areas especially. Sun lotion is a must. There may even be a tanned hunk nearby to help put it on those hard to reach places!
Okay so we should all know this one but I'll state it anyway for the naughty ones amongst us... Do not be inappropriate! You've not entered a beach pornography set. These are genuine people just enjoying the freedom and liberation of being naked. Nudity is not always an erotic activity, so just chill and think of sad thoughts if you must. Don't feel bad if nature occurs though (gents), we know these things can happen at the most inappropriate times. Maybe if your little gent gets over excited, cover him up with a towel?
Okay, Staring! Do not stare at naked people. I know this sounds obvious but it's so easy to be overwhelmed as a newcomer seeing so many naked bodies. Just have a quick glance around and then maybe read a book rather than staring at the sausage collection!
Also, respect peoples space. Don't go and pop your towel right next to someone who's sitting there completely naked minding their own business. This may lead to them becoming uncomfortable and vulnerable. Keep your distance until told otherwise.
And just before you go running down the beach flashing everything your mamma gave you, do make sure you are actually at a nudist beach and not just a regular beach. A night behind bars is not really the fun exciting time you'd have hoped for!
Right, I have nothing more to teach you, so go out there strip off and let me know how you get on. Enjoy being naked you beauty bum. Once you've mastered the nudist beach, we'll try a little naked camping, I hear these campsites are a unique experience that must be tried at least once in your lifetime!